A guide to wedding etiquette

The big day can bring stress for everyone especially when trying to follow traditions without removing the romance from your special day.

Deciding on a theme for invitations can be difficult enough but did you know it is considered lazy to use abbreviations on the invitations provided to your guests and many people prefer to have at least 6 months prior to the wedding in order to book a hotel or find outfits depending on the demands of your big day.

It is considered tradition for the grooms parents to organise and pay for a rehearsal dinner in order to alleviate any stress from the bride's parents. Confrontation is often avoided at your wedding reception by strategic seat planning as this prevents confrontations between those family members that might not get along from being next to each other for the remainder of your big day. For example when considering starting to work in the industry I discovered that many planners have been spoken to in a disrespectful manner by the family of clients once they were intoxicated with a planner I had spoken to also being assaulted by a member of the wedding party after they were asked to leave due to being intoxicated. This is not considered acceptable wedding etiquette.

The traditional order for speeches is to begin with the father of the bride, then proceed to the groom and then the bride (should she wish to speak) followed finally by the best man. Speeches should be long enough to portray a message without losing the crowd.

It is not just the bride and groom that must follow etiquette the guests must also behave in a mature, respectful and often traditional manner. For example it would be considered distasteful to bring a plus one to the big day if your invitation does not specify that you are entitled to this. If you wish to bring your significant other notify the bride and groom of this so everyone is certain of the number of people attending the special day. The guests should also treat anyone hired by the happy couple with respect as these people could have spent many hours attending to every need of the bride and groom and should be treated in a manner that reflects this hard work.

Another thing that is considered etiquette is that no engagements or pregnancies are unexpectedly announced as this should not occur if not previously green-lighted by the bride and groom. Guests should also introduce themselves to any guests they may not be familiar with and refrain from getting intoxicated as this could jeopardize the happiness of the bride and groom. Answering phone calls or staying on the phone unless an emergency.

The bride and groom may also prefer to be notified if you lose childcare as they may prefer not to have children at their wedding as often children can be left to run around chaotically as this could cause quite a lot of trouble for the bride and groom if a child is injured from running around their reception venue.